I was coming to this thread to sort of whine about how those two books have terrible narrative structure, and are basically clusterfuck.
But thank you guys for now making me defending it - a little bit at least.
Yup.
So first things I agree from last few posts:
Peace Talks was not Marster's best work. Sound quality is not good, the voices are off. Maybe not enough rehearsal time, it's hard to tell from the outside looking in.
Yeah I agree. And there are few moments where there is clear cut, and once I'm quite sure sentence read by someone else cause they forget about it with James. Shoddy. But then Battle Ground is way better, and why I'm angry for instance with killing off Murphy (not killing per se, but contrieved way to do it - Marsters made it excellent).
Thomas, the schemer, just buckles to blackmail. Not, for example, waltzing in and saying "hey, I'm being blackmailed to murder you, what say you pretend to be murdered and throw me in a cell" or something similar. Justine's now full villain - when the smart thing to do, given she would probably die from child birth, would have Alfred toss her into the same cell as Thomas so that the kid can't kill her. (So finding out about Nemesis *after* already locking Nemesis up).
Totally agree. This whole Nemesis Thomas story is utter nonsense. Thomas acts like absolute idiot, and fact he is ready to tell Harry it's Justine afterwards is even worse. Srsly everyone acts like utter dumbass here, and Nemesis plan is also full of holes - and no her "act of faith" and "apocalypse is state of mind" speech does not justifies it.
It's fanfiction, teenage level storytelling level. No way especially after Cold Days that Thomas would react to such blackmail simply with going on with it.
Also why the child? Like really? For what? Justine itself would not be good enough to force Thomas to do something? And if Nemesis is not able to hurt Justine simply by being it, why we consider baby in danger?
Stupid. Stupid. Stupid. Bloody stupid.
For all contrievances of those books, and of all saga - this is the worst.
This time Harry’s involvment wad much wider. Wouldn’t this story have been better served if it had been a stand alone set in the Dresdenverse written in 3rd person with multiple POVs rater than just Harry? It would have served the same purpose without making the events seem... small.
I had another idea. Rather than Endgame - make it Saving Private Ryan. Push Harry to wander as middle-weight through burning Chicago to proper place to attack Ethniu when most things happen beyond his sight. Torture him with sounds and smell. Put some fight within but small. Make him be accompanied by Knights, few Alphas and Murphy, and that's it. Maybe gather small army way later.
Do not put him everywhere. Kill at least three semi-important characters of screen - like wardens could totally die without Harry being there.
Just stop yourself from need to showing everything Jim. You write FPP books - accept their limitations.
Corrupting the bearers certainly seems to be a goal, but I'm not sure the Church isn't failing to understand other goals when they think it's all a struggle for the Denarians' souls. As far as the immortals are concerned, it's five minutes to midnight on the major throw-down to culminate this cycle of the starborn conjunction calendar. I'm not sure further corrupting some souls is *that* big a deal for Namshiel, compared to making advantageous moves in the bigger landscape.
I agree. Denarians are clearly more about stopping Outsiders, maybe by producing own Apocalypse to take over reality, before puny mortals and demigos allow Outer Gates to fall, than about simply corrupting people.
OK, so now about things I really disagree with in terms of criticism.
- Murph dies, removing her form the series. Annoying, but - becoming a valkyrie undermines both her shown religious beliefs and her refusal to sign on to any of the powers to be healed.
Primo, she becomes Einhernjarn not Valkyrie. Second, valkyries are mortals with benefits. If she made deal with Odin - service for power when alive she could become one. Third, really after two divorces, breaking freaking Sword of the Cross, rejecting KotC job because she's too strong and independent to serve Divine Providence, after all those things let's be honest - Catholic upbringing is just excuse to avoid unwanted flirting with Valkyries
Quatro, more importantly - you know Odin has claim of fallen in battles at least those somehow sacrificed to them. It's possible he could take Murphy and she had little to say about it. Free will of mortals is not absolute power.
- Dresden threatens One Eye 2nd hand if he mistreats Murph...after failing to avenge her while on the spot. Blow hard.
- Gard fails to call him out on this.
How are those two comparable? Now that I think about it Gard could call him for it - as norse paganism was hard for vengeance, but really those are two different things. If Odin is bad guy secretely torturing Einhernjars then Dresden has reason to fight him, to stop this.
There was no stoping anyway with Rudolph. It was manslaughter due to negligence. He didn't plan it - he was not planning to dunno help Fomor or Ethniu. Literally no reason to kill him - at least not from Christian perspective of Angel within Lightsaber
People are just for blood, to get satisfaction not because it really solves anything - and it's smart from Jim side to say his readers - No, you bunch of fucking sociopaths!
Dresden then belittles her death, sub serving the narrative so it's all about him [...] Standard sociopathic behavior, falls in line with "He said .... " to set a narrative that favors the narcissus.
A bit yes - though in a way - Dresden serves very nicely as readers proxy here. Really suitable.
Because I've seen ton of two things: primo, calling for Rudolph's blood and inventing terrible punishments for him; secundo, whining that Murphy's death was stupid, worthless, undignified, that she should go like a badass, dunno with dead Jotun falling over her than anything. And both times Dresden as our proxy is smacked. And I must say I find his reaction somehow justified - primo, it's not like he is recruit for Valhalla hiring standards, second, for him like for many readers this death must seems like really... bad, like freak accident, stupid Rudolph in middle of everything. As for many readers it's not proper hero exit for him, and Gard is there to sort of call him back to senses.
- twerp who murdered Murph justified it by calling her a terrorist, so no doubt will be promoted, not punished, given the mortal decision to call the trashing of Chicago a terrorist attack.
- sword that broke rather than let Murph try and save Harry, is happy to kill Harry rather than let him avenge Murph.
- sword wielders would rather 11 million innocents die that permit the punishment of 1 murderer.
Look, dude. You can sort of dislike White God perspective on justice, but it is what it is. What have you expected after all those years with Knights of the Cross? That they would condone personal vengeance? Blood for blood? Not gonna happen. Wanna vengeance go with Winter or Odin. You have plenty teams around with different take on morality.
There are rules, and rules will be obeyed. Harry made Amorachius breakable because he used it to trick faerie in book 3. Sure murder is out of the question.
Not to mention. Rudolph is not a murderer. Not by any sane justice system.
What he did was manslaughter due to negligence. He didn't want, or plan to kill Murphy - damn Harry can clearly feel his self-loathing later.
He's just coward in denial. Pityful. Somehow this pityfullness makes people more angry, funny enough.
Shit I think if Drakul or Redcap would shank Murphy for political gain - people would be less for their blood (or whatever Drakul has) because at least they are cool, not pathetic.
Marcone was interesting because he was the vanilla mortal who could stand equal with supernaturals. Now he's just another coppertop.
Absolutely disagree. Whole point is - you cannot. United States as a whole nation maybe could - but single vanilla mortal is not for long game. Neither Murphy, nor Marcone. Arm up or die. There will be no mortal-empowering message here - and I am happy for that, it's overall realistic if disheartning a bit. And let's remember Marcone last time just after becoming Baron - was kidnapped and almost murdered or converted by force by Denarians, and his status did him nothing - if not for Dresden's and Knight's help he'd be toast. So of course he seek power. He is freaking crime lord - not some defender of humanity.
Another good thing is Marcone has definitely much too following as "honorable godfather" so I'm really happy to see something that may sour his image in eyes of readers.
Molly goes cackling witch.
I think Molly quite finely shifts between herself and Winter Lady. Which is to be expected until some mayor shift in this field.
Ramirez goes whinny teenager.
To some extent. But both he and Dresden are guilty of this miscommunication. If anything Dresden more.
He lies to Ramirez since book 9 (there is literally scene in "White Night" when Ramirez points out to him that he keeps secrets, important ones, just as Ramirez is taking his call to help him take down Malvora and Madrigal - and it doesn't changes a bit.).
And of course Ramirez is in even worse shape and more prejudiced against Winter Faerie, after Molly almost ripped him to shreds. So that should also be taken into account.
Ebenezer's response to "Oh, I didn't kill you in a fit of fury?" is indifference.
Is it? He's first sorrowful, then furious for Harry deceit. Then we don't see him till Battle Ground - when we do not get much resolution because McCoy is keeping cold head - Dresden says it himself, he can feel Ebenezer is still angry, but he focus on battle, and tries to convince Dresden to not fall into Mab's clutch - though their discussion is very vague as they are not alone, so - PT events are not directly mentioned.
I think we gonna get some discussion between Dresden and McCoy in "Twelve Months".
Extra thing: what makes me angry about Karrin's death is not well that she dies as vanilla mortals, and bit in accident than in fight itself.
It's extreme contrieved, and extremely telegraphed.
Her scenes with Dresden are just reeking with "love interest will be killed" vibe all those books.
Rudolph trigger finger is over-foreshadows to nausea.
So what I'd change - just cut Rudolph from it. He is not needed, aside to apparently give readers and Dresden more hate than it's healthy, and fact they are constantly meeting is just too coincidental. (And it being reason of supernatural manipulation would make it even worse).
Then - place this book year later. Let relationship of Dresden and Murphy go from this semi-honeymoon-but-she's-crippled to some more interesting moment when they plan how to arrange this common life all things consider. Like for instance Karrin being sort of step-mother, and those things.
Most optimally book between SG and PT, where Karrin have to really struggle and get to peace with her condition - only to of course go into heat of battle anyway when her city is in danger.
