McAnally's (The Community Pub) > Author Craft

Grammar Challenge... Are you up to the task?

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Shecky:
"He saw himself as a man-manager and was a public voice in the drive to reform Scotland's penal system: brighter, better-equipped halls, a strong emphasis on vocational training, education and counseling, no more overcrowding, no more brutality."

I use commas instead of semicolons here because semicolons project more of a pause in the thought process, as opposed to a simple continuation of a list (as indicated by the colon). But I'd like to know precisely what was meant by "man manager"; if they meant "a man and a manager", a slash would be more appropriate.

black_hawk_sam:
the way I had puntuated it was more of a monolouge... the semi colons were where a heroic pose would be struck and chin lifted to the distance...

Shecky:
I was punctuating it to be a grammatical, written sentence; stage-direction punctuation is a bit iffy in that area.

black_hawk_sam:
or as in a speech... direct quote narration from a 3rd person limited POV... maybe?

Starbeam:

--- Quote from: Shecky on May 04, 2011, 09:26:09 PM ---"He saw himself as a man-manager and was a public voice in the drive to reform Scotland's penal system: brighter, better-equipped halls, a strong emphasis on vocational training, education and counseling, no more overcrowding, no more brutality."

I use commas instead of semicolons here because semicolons project more of a pause in the thought process, as opposed to a simple continuation of a list (as indicated by the colon). But I'd like to know precisely what was meant by "man manager"; if they meant "a man and a manager", a slash would be more appropriate.

--- End quote ---
I'd do it like this, except maybe a comma after education and a semicolon after counseling.

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