I know that letting other people see your stuff can be tough, tramatic even if they are in the least bit negative. And at the same time letting go of your draft, even for the short while someone is putting in suggestions and pointing out flaw, can feel like you're loosing control of things.
But you know what, whether its this book, or three books from now, I really advise you to find someone or someones you trust and as soon as you're done with your rough draft shoot it over to them. Everything from logic flaws to grammar nits can be found much more rapidly with a second or third or sixth opinion. More, that time you don't spend laboriously going over your draft adnosium until handing it off, is time you can spend writing new material.
I'm not saying don't go over it again, but let that unjaundiced eye skitter over it and give you their impressions before wading back in off the deep end. It'll make spotting things that much easier. Plus if you have multiples, if one person says you don't do X enough or I think this is a problem and you disagree or want to disagree and no one else is having that problem you feel free to go with your gut. On the other hand if 5 of the 6 people are pointing to the same problem then you know its not a personal attack, even if it feels that way, instead its something you need to work on and improve.
Finally I know that everyone has their own process. I'm sure there are some people who constitutionally can't start working on the next chapter until they've handed out the previous chapter to their beta's to read. Which means conversely there must be some people who not only can't share their work to anyone until they think its publish worthy, they literally lock themselves in a cabin in the woods outside of all human contact until they're ready and then only correspond with their editor via the written word.
All I say is that most people probably fall somewhere in the middle of that and that if you do, my experience has been that getting help helps and the sooner I can do that in my process the better both for the story and for my time management. I do a better job editing and have more time for writing when I do.
I'm going to but out of this conversation now and wish you guys the best of luck!
don't let anyone get you down,
The Deposed King