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Messages - FishStampede

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16
DFRPG / Re: Spring Autumn Courts homebrew
« on: October 17, 2012, 01:26:04 PM »
Just noticed this. The Spring and Autumn courts are quite prominent in my game, though currently I'm keeping them pretty mysterious.

I have the King of Autumn being the Reaper (aka Samhain, but Reaper is his most common name these days). He's a terrifying figure dressed all in black, resembling Reverend Kane from Poltergeist II. He is utterly without mercy, but also without cruelty. It is his job to end things and he does it. He is, however, pretty bad at political games and often leaves unintended loopholes in his edicts which his Prince exploits.

Jack is the Prince of Autumn. Which Jack? All of them. Jack Frost, Jack O'Lantern, Jack the Giant Killer, etc. He was once a mortal, but he tricked his way into power in the court when he trapped the Reaper King in a magical sack. He wanted immortality, and got it as a Sidhe. He also cannot be killed or significantly harmed by any forces of Autumn, including, unfortunately, the Reaper King, which makes his ambition to become Autumn King dangerous. He looks like a surprisingly ordinary young man dressed in slightly old-fashioned "country boy" clothes.

The Spring court hasn't been dealt with much, but they're currently courting (no pun intended) a PC to be the Knight of Spring. She also happens to be Jack's daughter, which would be a huge insult to to Autumn. Their representative is a certain Robert Goodman, who is a slightly sleazy but charming man in a suit who lives on deals and tricks. He's actually Puck, and the Prince of Spring. Naturally, Oberon is the King, though he has yet to appear "onscreen."

17
Author Craft / Re: "It's nice."
« on: October 17, 2012, 12:16:29 PM »
You're right. I should have been nicer to them. I do sometimes suffer from lack of empathy, and I guess I forgot how crushed I felt the first time someone gave me a brutally honest critique of my work. Maybe I felt angry because their critique was so limp, but that doesn't excuse me being a jackass. This is my first time critiquing in a classroom setting, so in the future I'll try to take a middle path.

And oooh yeah, my work has developed a lot. Just over the past year, in fact, though really that's around when I started writing for real after a long time not. My story for this class is actually a reworking of a story I wrote early this year as fanfiction, and even removing the fanfiction element, there is just no comparison between the two.

18
Author Craft / Re: "It's nice."
« on: October 16, 2012, 05:39:14 PM »
Given the entire point of the piece was her struggling with making the decision, and emphasizing it was her decision, I really disliked her externalizing it like that. Turning the entire point of the work into an edict from on high just fell really flat to me. That is, of course, just my opinion.

19
Author Craft / Re: "It's nice."
« on: October 16, 2012, 02:35:23 PM »
Hah, that's funny. I went first in our peer review group, and then when the other people had their turn, I really tore into them. Mainly because they did have good ideas but they were executed very sloppily. One girl wrote a deeply personal autobiographical piece almost entirely in the passive voice, where she made a life changing decision with the powerful, moving line:

"The decision had been made." :o

The other girl in my group wrote poetry that I really liked, but she needed to work on her subtext. She accidentally made an ode to a beloved, deceased uncle make him sound like a drunken child molester. She was not happy when I pointed this out.

If I'd gone last, they probably would have torn into me out of pure revenge.

20
Author Craft / Re: Peer Review Sites
« on: October 14, 2012, 12:52:34 PM »
Well, I signed up for FanStory. I think you're wrong about it being free, as even after building up a ton of points through grinding reviews, I still couldn't figure out how to post my story without upgrading my membership.

So I did. I look at prices in terms of the latest video game release, and two years' membership at FanStory costs less than Borderlands 2+Mechromancer DLC. Probably better for me in the long run as well. I've posted a short story over there that I have to turn in tomorrow for a class and submit for publication. It's getting five and six star reviews, but I still have niggling doubts.

Here it is if you want to take a look and shoot me a review:

http://www.fanstory.com/displaystory.jsp?id=560732

Never got a response back from the other site. Oh well.

21
Author Craft / Re: "It's nice."
« on: October 14, 2012, 12:30:17 PM »
Yeesh. Posting it on, say, DeviantArt I can see how yours might get lost in the shuffle, but how is that even possible for a peer review? Don't they kinda have to say something?

22
DFRPG / Re: Warden Sword for a Mortal?
« on: October 12, 2012, 03:47:00 PM »
All very good points. I think I'm going to have to say no to a "warden sword," unfortunately. It just breaks setting and established rules far too much. I really do hate saying no to players, especially when they have an interesting idea that fits their character.

However, I'd like to keep my stunt on the table for him. The character has, if not actual magical talent, at the very least magical awareness manifesting primarily as a "spooky sense," so it would make sense if he had some ability to use enchanted items. I think it should be possible to take them without giving up the mortal bonus, provided you spend other character sheet resources.

As is, is the stunt up there balanced? It's not an Item of Power, it's significantly weaker than Ritual or even Bag of Tricks (giving only two slots instead of four), but does gain the inherent flexibility of Stunts and could allow a mortal to get a couple enchanted items. I'd veto the Warden Sword, but would probably allow a stripped-down "Deputy Sword" or something.

23
DFRPG / Warden Sword for a Mortal?
« on: October 12, 2012, 12:53:22 PM »
One of my players is playing a pure mortal. He has expressed interest in getting a weapon like a Warden Sword. He's a (distant) descendant of Martha Liberty and is related to the Warden living in Atlanta, GA, so it's not entirely outside the realm of possibility (if vanishingly unlikely). It would certainly tie in more to his background as the muggle of a wizard family and give him some nice new tricks.

How would you handle a mortal getting enchanted items? I'm less concerned with the potential implications of a mortal with such a rare weapon (those implications are just better story fodder) than I am with potential balance. Given that they're not really making the item, perhaps a stunt to give a mortal access to "slots" that they then spend on that single item?

Stunt proposal:

Lore
Well Equipped: You may or may not be supernatural, but either way you have access to magical gear. Who makes it for you? This gives you two enchanted item slots. You can swap these out any time you could change enchanted items, but justifying the change may be a bit harder if you don't have any magic yourself. The strength of these items is still set by your Lore.

24
I managed to finish my first 10 page short story set in my fantasy universe. I finished it for a writing class and we're supposed to be submitting it for publication on Monday. Wish me luck!

25
Author Craft / "It's nice."
« on: October 10, 2012, 11:04:59 PM »
Is there any worse feedback to get? In my creative writing class today, my two peer reviewers had little of note to say about my story, other than "It's good," "I like it," "It's nice," etc. I managed to squeeze a few more helpful bits out of them, but in the end I came to the conclusion either my story is absolutely goshdarn perfect, or they're just being...nice. Maybe it's just because I had the misfortune to go first.

How can you get good, useful feedback from people?

26
DFRPG / Re: Sponsored Magic: Shonokin (Asheville, stay out)
« on: October 10, 2012, 12:45:09 PM »
There's also the fact that under the very next header it says it emulates Evocation and Thaumaturgy. So as to the exact limitations of Sponsored Magic:



"I've heard it both ways."

I'll pin it down to Resurrectionist giving things related to life or creation, Annihlationist giving things related to destruction. That's about as specific as the given examples.

27
DFRPG / Re: Sponsored Magic: Shonokin (Asheville, stay out)
« on: October 09, 2012, 04:14:03 PM »
Kinda brings in the larger issue of just how vague Sponsored Magic actually is. The way I read it it's a slightly cheaper version of Evocation and Thaumaturgy, with some tweaks like inability to take refinements, implicit approval, and the slight "bonus" of being able to go into sponsor debt (my players already fear sponsor debt).

Again, like the "ancient knowledge" thing, I severely doubt my players will take this, it's more a behind the scenes bookkeeping thing. If you want to tweak it to make it more balanced, be my guest, but for NPCs this is probably enough.

28
DFRPG / Science Fiction Double Feature II (Asheville, stay out)
« on: October 09, 2012, 01:09:39 PM »
If you're in a DFRPG game set in Asheville, please do not read this thread.





I posted a thread of this title earlier about whether or not introducing science fiction elements to the Dresden Files would work. I decided ultimately, as long as they are of a Lovecraftian "alien/unnatural magictec" type, it worked. So now, for Halloween, we're coming up on my next major plotline with the rise and fall of the Shonokin, and it's a real monster mash.

The Shonokin are an ancient race predating human habitation of North America. They were nearly wiped out by megafauna-riding invaders who nowadays we know as Native Americans (a term the Shonokin reflexively get angry about, they were here first dammit!). They are immortal unless killed, and now survive in small enclaves scattered around the country, pursuing their own ends and hoping to end all human life so they can rise again. Problem: Their numbers are so small they could barely fill the stands at a minor league baseball game, and they have no females. Solution: Create female Shonokin.

To this end, they have taken over a research lab in the local area that was built on the site of an asylum fire where a hundred women died. The lab is actually a real place locally, and the asylum fire is real history. I have a friend who works there and it's actually pretty boring, but calling the place Genova is just too ominous to pass up. Anyway, there they have been conducting all sorts of experiments on kidnapped homeless people, attempting to create more Shonokin. The results have been failure. Attempts to transform a human into a shonokin have created monsters. Attempts to implant human women with (female) shonokin fetuses have resulted in the death of both. Still, research continues, and their strange mix of science and sorcery is close to yielding results thanks to harnessing the angry spirits of the location.

The Shonokin fear death, eschewing anything risky and not even touching dead bodies, so to get their test subjects and dispose of failed experiments, they've contracted with a local mobster nicknamed The Old Man. He's a former associate of Marcone who Marcone lets live only as an insult. The Old Man is, as noted, quite old, in his late 70s-early 80s, and knows his own time is short. The Shonokin have promised him immortality once their research is complete, which he knows is bull but still wants to see where this goes. His right hand man (or woman, as it were) is a werecoyote named Will who one of my players has a history with. He honestly sees her as an apprentice of sorts, since he is more of a trickster and manipulator than a badass ala Marcone. He's somewhat secured his legacy through Will, but the promise of immortality is still tempting.

The two tricksters have set up the Shonokin, and are trying to kill two birds with one stone. The shonokin's latest experiment is their riskiest yet. They decided that if human females were too weak to survive, though implantation does occur, then they could turn to a near-human. Will and the Old Man have therefore gone after the local White Court, and kidnapped someone who they told the Shonokin was a nobody, just a minor unimportant and rebellious member of the White Court. Turns out though she's actually the daughter of the local head of the court, Pastor Will Buncombe (aka Guillarme Bellacroix), and when he finds out she's missing he's going to go through no expense to find the people responsible. He's a Wrath vampire, so he'll burn down the whole city if he has to to rescue his daughter.

The Old Man and Will's goal is to wipe out the two biggest supernatural players in the city, since there is no official Council rep, the paranet just had a crisis of leadership, and there is also no Red Court (yet). Hopefully this will leave a power vacuum they can step in, and if The Old Man gets immortality out of the deal, bonus!

They didn't count, however, on the Autumn Court. They are about dying and the ending of the seasons. The Reaper King no likey the Shonokin Resurrectionists. It's well past their time to die. So, he tells his troublesome Autumn Knight "All Shonokin within this city must be dead by the end of All Hallow's, or your life is forfeit." "What's a Shonokin?" "Did you think I would make it easy?" Again, two birds with one stone.

And now, if you squint, you can just barely make out Frankenstein vs. Wolfman vs. Dracula. Maybe the Reaper King could be called a mummy, but it's a stretch. What's funny is this was entirely unintentional, it just came about thanks to trying to tie everyone in.

29
DFRPG / Re: Sponsored Magic: Shonokin (Asheville, stay out)
« on: October 09, 2012, 12:32:11 PM »
good point on it not being a real drawback, I'll just merge that all and say "Special."

As fr whether or not it lets you throw fireballs...I'd say you can pretty much do whatever with it as long as the Shonokin would approve. Resurrectionists lean more towards the biomantic side of water and eschew fire for thematic reasons (though they could still use it), while Annihilationists tend to eschew anything that creates growth, so pretty much the destructive sides of water and fire. You can create wards even with Resurrectionist magic, though as in all things it's how you describe it that counts most.

In either case, Shonokin magic is on the line of Clarke's Law, with a bit of Lovecraft. It's technology, but it's really weird, alien technology. It's also magic, but it's magic that seems almost scientific and juuust outside understanding.

30
DFRPG / Sponsored Magic: Shonokin (Asheville, stay out)
« on: October 08, 2012, 04:40:47 PM »
Now that my next plotline is about to start up and I'm building the main antagonists, I figure the easiest way to represent the powers of their sorcerers is to give them a special kind of Sponsored Magic. Also used for the few corrupt humans who they manage to get on their side:

Shonokin Magic [-4]
Description: The Shonokin are a most ancient race, predating human habitation of North America. In their heyday, they practiced great magic alongside technological might that humans are just now beginning to reach. When the Invaders came and wiped them out, they lost much of their power. However, they filled in the gaps by contracting with unsavory entities the world has largely forgotten.
Sponsor: Shonokin Magic is sponsored by the ancient race of Shonokin, and their dire masters from beyond. When choosing this though, specify whether your magic is sponsored by the "regenerationist" faction or the "annihilationist" faction of Shonokin.
Agenda: The Shonokin are primarily concerned with recovering their lost power. The two main factions have very different ideals on how to do this, though. Annihilationists believe in bringing down the wrath of their forgotten gods and wiping humankind (as well as their gods) off the face of the earth. Regenerationists believe in finding some way to restore their race's fertility, which is hampered by the fact there are no surviving Shonokin females. This may seem more noble, but they're willing to go to any ends to do this, including subjecting humans to horrific experiments. Also, they still believe in wiping out mankind, it's just a question of which should come first.
Evocation: Shonokin magic calls upon most ancient gods, but also technology long-lost. Regenerationists lean more towards odd technology, such as devices that warp and twist human bodies, while annihilationists lean more towards calling on the forgotten gods. Either way, the results are unnatural, alien, and disturbing.
Thaumaturgy: Regenerationist rituals often use technology, such as advanced lab equipment and humans rendered into stem cells (it is still magic though). Annihlationist rituals  look more magical, but follow precise fractal designs.
Evothaum: Regenerationist magic allows the use of biomancy at evocation speed. Annihilationist magic allows the use of entropomancy at evocation speed.
Extra Benefits: Using either form of Shonokin magic allows you to interact with the actual Shonokin without penalty despite their alien nature. Also, your magic does not cause any problems with technology.
Drawbacks: If you are not a Shonokin, you gain their penalty to social interactions. People can just sense the otherworldliness surrounding you. (treat as "Dude, you're dead!" under the "Living Dead" power, without the additional effects of physical consequences)

Despite the fact I'm treating them as two different factions, they're actually not very different. It's merely a matter of priorities, and relations between the two are pretty cordial because there aren't enough left for any ideological conflict to be worth it.

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