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potential synopsis

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seradhe:
ok, so I've actually managed to get one of my stories to a point where sending it out to publishers is a real possibility. Now comes the part where I realize I have absolutely no clue what to send. Thankfully this forum has helped me a lot with that (after several hours of scrolling through old posts). So I've got a decent letter made, and have worked out a synopsis of the storyline. it reads a lot like the back-of-the-book deal, but it could work.. thoughts...


Dr. Margaret Ross Had it all. She is in charge of one of the top molecular physics labs in the world, considered the authority on atomic structure. And to top it all off her fiance of seven years had finally proposed. Then it all came crashing down with the discovery of the theta particle, a unique Micro-molecule that appeared to respond to human thought patterns.
Now she's a fugitive. Everything Margaret owns has been taken away from her, and even the one man in her life she trusted refuses her calls. Forced to trust a complete stranger, and running away from a government that wants to weaponize her discovery, and a mysterious organization that will kill to keep certain secrets hidden.

the neurovore of Zur-En-Aargh:

--- Quote from: seradhe on March 04, 2008, 06:59:50 AM ---Dr. Margaret Ross Had it all. She is in charge of one of the top molecular physics labs in the world, considered the authority on atomic structure. And to top it all off her fiance of seven years had finally proposed. Then it all came crashing down with the discovery of the theta particle, a unique Micro-molecule that appeared to respond to human thought patterns.
Now she's a fugitive. Everything Margaret owns has been taken away from her, and even the one man in her life she trusted refuses her calls. Forced to trust a complete stranger, and running away from a government that wants to weaponize her discovery, and a mysterious organization that will kill to keep certain secrets hidden.

--- End quote ---

That's not a synopsis, that's a blurb.

What publishers want from a synopsis, sfaict, is a summary of the plot that indicates that it holds together all the way through and has a decent ending. In other words, don't hint at secrets, show how cool they really are.  Fewer of the adjectives, more straight description.

[ Publishers have people to write blurbs.  I'm not aware of any published authors who get to write their own. ]

Also, calling your theta particle a micro-molecule suggests heavy-duty handwaving and not knowing much physics; there are SF editors for whom this may well be a disadvantage.

Also also, you hop back and forth between past, present and pluperfect tense in this para; the recommendations I have had suggest doing synopses entirely in present.

seradhe:
Thanks.

after re-reading it I am inclined to agree with you, I should not work on such things when sleep-deprived (take note the time I posted that).

I was trying too hard for the "pick me up and read me to find out what's happening!" style, way too needy from my standpoint.

As for the Physics and science fact regarding the story, I'm still juggling between a particle or an energy wave for the final draft. the initial concept was inspired by the Dust from the "His Dark Materials" trilogy. As I'm writing, I'm consistently picking at my Fathers mind (aerospace engineer and true renaissance man of sci-fi), as well as my collection of decade-old college physics books for terms and definitions.

myrdinemries:
How close to reality are you trying to make this?

If you're trying to get as close as you can, I'd make your Oh-my-God Particle a type of Boson. They are the "force particles"; ie. light (photons), strong nuclear force (gluons), gravity (the theorised graviton), etc. A fundamental  force that responds to human thought would be plenty for a government to freak out over, and seems to fit what your blurb has shown about your story.

Also, to discover any new particles you really need a particle accelerator. Preferably a really big one. You may want to model your lab around CERN's Large Hadron Collider.

the neurovore of Zur-En-Aargh:

--- Quote from: myrdinemries on March 07, 2008, 02:26:34 AM ---If you're trying to get as close as you can, I'd make your Oh-my-God Particle a type of Boson. They are the "force particles"; ie. light (photons), strong nuclear force (gluons), gravity (the theorised graviton), etc. A fundamental  force that responds to human thought would be plenty for a government to freak out over, and seems to fit what your blurb has shown about your story.

--- End quote ---

If I wanted to do this, I'd go from some of the spookier stuff about observer effects in quantum mechanics, though if you do that, the standard you're likely to be compared against is Greg Egan's Quarantine, which might be worth having read.  [ And which is a good book and worth reading anyway, though not Egan's best. ]

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