McAnally's (The Community Pub) > Author Craft
Accountability, author's timecard, word count written, feeling lonely out there?
meg_evonne:
eek, before it dies away on us.
yeah, this AM was about 250 words plus nice revision.
Kali:
In the interest of not letting die out on us, I'll update too! I haven't been writing much since December. Life events came, very serious ones. But things are on the upswing and I've found my passion for writing again. I'm fiddling with fanfics right now, largely Star Wars: Old Republic (I used to do some renders for the same, hence the new avatar on here. I made that!), and I'm putting a "What If..." spin on an old Star Wars fic by request of a reader. An NC-17 spin, if ya know what I mean. *eyebrow waggle*
I've removed all pressures of word count or subject matter off myself. If I feel like writing Dresden fic, I do. If I feel like working on my novel, I do. If I feel like writing a series of unconnected Spider-Man combat scenes complete with witty repartee, I do. It's all fun!
meg_evonne:
--- Quote from: Kali on May 24, 2011, 09:02:04 PM ---In the interest of not letting die out on us, I'll update too! I haven't been writing much since December. Life events came, very serious ones. But things are on the upswing and I've found my passion for writing again. I'm fiddling with fanfics right now, largely Star Wars: Old Republic (I used to do some renders for the same, hence the new avatar on here. I made that!), and I'm putting a "What If..." spin on an old Star Wars fic by request of a reader. An NC-17 spin, if ya know what I mean. *eyebrow waggle*
I've removed all pressures of word count or subject matter off myself. If I feel like writing Dresden fic, I do. If I feel like working on my novel, I do. If I feel like writing a series of unconnected Spider-Man combat scenes complete with witty repartee, I do. It's all fun!
--- End quote ---
good for you Kali and I'm sorry you went through a difficult patch. Writing does seem to be tied to our moods, doesn't it?
Kali:
Y'know what's weird? I'm assuming many, if not most, of us have read Stephen King's "On Writing." I thought it was fascinating, not only the actual writerly stuff but also the look into the life of a full-time writer. I remember him talking about his alcoholism and how he doesn't remember even writing... What was it, Cujo? He talked later about how when he stopped drinking, he was terrified that he wouldn't be able to write. That he'd become so accustomed to writing while drunk, he had to re-find his faith in his talent, had to re-learn the actual act of accessing his subconscious while sober.
I kinda get that now.
At the risk of over-sharing or becoming one of those whiny people, I had a serious rock-bottom time with my depression. I actively tried to commit suicide. So that, needless to say, took me out at the knees as far as writing. But now I'm better, I'm recovering. I'm in therapy, I'm on anti-depressants (and not the ones that led to the suicidal ideation either), and for so long, for months, I've been afraid to write.
I got so used to writing as a way of disconnecting from the world. I got used to it being part of my isolation, my own little safe bubble, that now that I'm leading a more-or-less normal life, I'm not sure I know how to write. I know I used to "feel like" writing because it was what I did to escape life. Now that I don't need to escape life, I'm having to redefine what writing is to me, why I do it. And I'm having to learn how to write while not depressed.
So that's what's really behind suspending all demands on myself. I'm learning to write for fun, as *part* of my life not *as* my life. And I'm learning that I still have talent, that I don't need to be depressed and alone in order to write. I'm learning how to write with a new mindset. Heck, a new mind.
Anyway, thread de-rail over.
Starbeam:
--- Quote from: Kali on May 24, 2011, 10:16:34 PM ---Y'know what's weird? I'm assuming many, if not most, of us have read Stephen King's "On Writing." I thought it was fascinating, not only the actual writerly stuff but also the look into the life of a full-time writer. I remember him talking about his alcoholism and how he doesn't remember even writing... What was it, Cujo? He talked later about how when he stopped drinking, he was terrified that he wouldn't be able to write. That he'd become so accustomed to writing while drunk, he had to re-find his faith in his talent, had to re-learn the actual act of accessing his subconscious while sober.
I kinda get that now.
At the risk of over-sharing or becoming one of those whiny people, I had a serious rock-bottom time with my depression. I actively tried to commit suicide. So that, needless to say, took me out at the knees as far as writing. But now I'm better, I'm recovering. I'm in therapy, I'm on anti-depressants (and not the ones that led to the suicidal ideation either), and for so long, for months, I've been afraid to write.
I got so used to writing as a way of disconnecting from the world. I got used to it being part of my isolation, my own little safe bubble, that now that I'm leading a more-or-less normal life, I'm not sure I know how to write. I know I used to "feel like" writing because it was what I did to escape life. Now that I don't need to escape life, I'm having to redefine what writing is to me, why I do it. And I'm having to learn how to write while not depressed.
So that's what's really behind suspending all demands on myself. I'm learning to write for fun, as *part* of my life not *as* my life. And I'm learning that I still have talent, that I don't need to be depressed and alone in order to write. I'm learning how to write with a new mindset. Heck, a new mind.
Anyway, thread de-rail over.
--- End quote ---
**hugs** Yeah, it was Cujo that King couldn't remember, though it was coke and alcohol, I think. I'm glad you're doing good.
I think it might be something of a common thing for people to have to relearn writing, though not necessarily for the same reasons. Hell, we could probably have an entire thread for this kinda thing. It can be a daunting prospect--to stop writing for months at a time and then figure out how to get back into it. Especially when you're used to writing to escape everything that depresses you and makes you unhappy, and the only thing that makes you happy is to get into the world in your head--until you actually are happy and wonder how you can write like that. I think that's the kinda thing I went through when I'd moved in with my b/f. I still sometimes have trouble getting into the writing instead of going out with him or playing games or whatnot. Though he constantly tells me to "Write the book" and helps me when I get stuck and can't quite figure out what needs to be done.
But oohhh....Think I might've gotten over one of my stumbling blocks, although it's gonna require lots of rewrites. Must write down before my mind wanders anymore, and I lose it.
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